i hate being a
pieces pisces sometimes (stupid spellcheck)
- Jumped out of a moving vehicle doing more than 30mph, and lived to tell about it without a scratch.
- Took a 40oz bottle to the noggin, weilded by a drunken punk, then beat the piss out of said punk.
- Brewed/stilled alchoholic beverages in a substance-free dorm. For money. More than once.
- Tickled a trout out of a mountain stream, gutted the fucker, and used his guts for bait to catch more trout.
- Paid for a girl's abortion, and claimed to be the father, on paper, to avoid fallout. I did this more than once, and none of the times was I actually sleeping with, or had designs to sleep with the women I did this for. I was actually paid back once.
- The lemon wedge bet, more than once. Nuff said.
- Stolen a memorial that weighed as much as I did at the time.
- Stayed drunk for an entire week to see if I could do it.
- Stayed awake for an entire week and worked through the hallucinations.
- Spit in the Mississippi river with one foor in Missouri, the other in Illinois.
- Came less than 1/4 inch from bleeding to death of a self-inflicted (accidental) puncture wound to the thigh.
- Played chess across the wire with a kid from Germany as a wee lad (before there was an internet), and get written up in the paper for it.
- Have sex on a Greyhound bus at 4am, while the bus was in transit, with other passengers on the bus. Got a standing ovation from the teenage punks three seats up when we finished.
- Been told by a professional spiritualist to leave the premesis of your interview/consulation because you are "hexed".
- Seen someone try to use a 'Jedi mind trick' on a cop, in real life.
the snow is the best thing i coulda gotten today. i love winter.